so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
I think a homeless person took a bath in my mouth while I was sleeping :(
when a girl says 'did you just try to kiss me' you should leave the bar. trust me.
just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
God dammit, you have a cape and I don't even have a fucking jacket.
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
I would just like you to know that the guy I blew off last weekend to come find ur drunk ass just got drafted into the major leagues.
Moment of silence for the loss of that option.
you can't wake me up at 4am to suck your dick and then give me a high five at the bar
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
It's sad that your definition of adulthood entails banging your boss after getting hammered at happy hour, and putting the tab on the company credit card.
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
The more time I spend surrounded by Mormons, the more I miss alcohol.
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
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