She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
Why are there maracas in the dishwasher?
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
I want nothing more to get stoned and go to your little sisters petting zoo party but I need to have priorities
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
Well im sitting on a futon on a porch at 1:30 in the afternoon drinking boxed wine out of a pint glass next to a chick with a homemade neckbrace. What do you think?
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
You were spooning an empty magnum of white wine in the middle of the bed so I slept on the couch
Well at least there's no more confusion about your place in my life. Wine > pizza > your dick > the rest of you.
Love you...
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
Not exactly hook line and sinker right away, but I'll give him a second chance. I should sext him me in my blue shark onesie.
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
Randomize
