Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
so apparently mom and dad slept together on the first date
i guess it runs in the family.
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
Do you remember anything yesterday that led to needing a cup of couscous in my closet?
And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
Dude, I puked in the stall for God knows how long. Halfway through, a kid sits down in the stall next to me and starts jacking off, i heard the porn on his phone and everything. so FYI, the middle stall is where good nights go to die
I would just like to go ahead and accept my slut of the year award.
It's like 10 times better than an Oscar
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
I stole an accordion from the bar
Accidentally
I'm having ragrets about stealing the accordion
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
Omg dude take a shower. You'll feel like god washed away all the sinful shit we did last night.
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