he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
I just puked while everyone was releasing balloons. Im to hungover for this memoial service. Rest in peace great gramps.
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
I suppose drinking a cosmo at lunch alone can't look good but I mean... sometimes it's just necessary
How do you get a black eye playing beer pong??
My goal for tonight is to swipe my debit card through those weird rolls on the back of a big bald guy's head.
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
You threw a handful of caps into a pitcher of Heineken and asked everyone if they wanted to go "bobbing for molly"
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
hey. this is your former cousin. you boned my best friend last night.
Randomize
