So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
my sisters under your porch take her home
its 10 pm and i am cleaning vomit off the ceiling. i am nowhere near drunk enough for this to be funny.
you were mass sexting so we took your phone away
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Fat girl left in a hurry. Possibly had to do with the missing bathroom door in my apartment.
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
If I can't pick up a cat lady, I probably need to turn to Internet dating.
If I ever go to Canada, I'm fucking the maple syrup out of his Canadian ass.
The three yr old girl I nanny grabbed a pole just now and is chanting "this is my house"
Sounds like you at that dive bar last weekend
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He told me that if he broke my bed my bed durring sex he would take me to ikea, but only on Monday because it's all you can eat meatballs. I think I'm in love.
You tried to stop drinking but then she started feeding you tequila with a spoon. You were like an adorable baby bird.
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
I was puking for like ten minutes when I realized my parents were fucking in the shower and were afraid to come out
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
So I tried to catch a rabbit in Terraria & accidentally blew it up with a grenade made of bees. Monty Python would be proud.
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