On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
dream priorities were more important than voting today. don't tell me you wouldn't keep going back to sleep to find out who would win a fight between oprah and godzilla
Speaking of roommates, Kelsey and I woke up to urine in our trash can. Neither one of us is willing to admit to it so we've come to the conclusion that someone snuck into our room in the middle of the night
So my dad just walked in on me with the same girl twice in 3 nights. I told him if he wants to see her tits to adleast admit it. All he did was smirk.
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
A seagull just tried to steal my cellphone
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
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