I just want to make him a cookie cake that says "you have no chance with me."
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
mom just asked if we are going to need more kaluha as she pulls 5 out of the cupboard. this xmas might kill me
She fucking ripped my chandelier out of my ceiling. How does that make her a keeper?
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
Woke up backwards on a recliner
The doctor basically called me a dirty dick.
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
So? Find me, fuck me, then you can go to sleep and I'll leave.
Wow. That's the most amazing thing anyone has ever said to me.
Sometimes a man just deserves to get woken up with a blowjob.
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
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