To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
You go to school with some of the ugliest girls I've ever seen... How are you not getting laid?
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
there was a kid getting taken out of the waterpark handcuffed to a wheelchair singing "tryna catch me ridin dirty"
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
Welp I just blew a load probably the size of a small pond if not a lake
Who the fuck is this
As i was walking home this morning some old lady was walking her dog and i said hello to her as our paths in life met, then i proceeded to puke in someones front yard and never looked back
Just used my front-facing camera to check my pupils. Technology!
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
Are you the reason I woke up without pants?
Um, just removed my insulin from the fridge so that I could fit our case in there. Tell me, who has their priorities straight? THIS GIRL.
Randomize
