yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
I haven't been "cry when you eat ben and jerrys" high in a while.
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
No. No, there is no forgiveness for this. The only way I'm forgiving you for this is if you somehow convince your sister to have sex with me. In her car.
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
Just found a g string in our driveway, wtf happened this weekend?
I shall welcome him into my body with an open liver and completely lay down all chance of resistance. Sweet Zeus, please take me to Mt. Olympus and share all that is divine. I promise, the secrets will be safe with me
Just got to her place. Her parents are here and are high as a kite.
Her father just game me a high 5 as they left the room. Her mom leaned in and said "this is a rebound thing"
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
...is this motivational speaking, or sexting? It's getting hard to tell.
I’m gonna slowly take you in my mouth and push you deep into my throat so my lips are right up against your body and then I’m gonna fucking bite your shit off if one more of our friends shows me a snap you took while I was giving you head. Are we clear?
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
Randomize
