Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
I can't believe you let me try to pierce your nipple with a dart last night
she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
He turned down a handjob. A HANDJOB. I know I'm no Jessica Simpson, but...
Actually, she's fat now, so...
Fuck. I AM Jessica Simpson.
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
My apartment stinks of burning failure
Randomize
