1:57 a.m. Where did you go???
1:58 a.m. What are you doing? I want to go home with you, why aren't you responding?
2:11 a.m. Heading back to your place now, will you let me in?
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
you wouldn't believe how quickly birth control dissolves in vodka
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
It was like giving head to a cactus.
I just power smoked 3 bongs, ate hot cocoa mix before making hot cocoa, and realized James Spader's character on The Office reminds me of your mom.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
can i text him and be like "oh yeah, forgot i kinda made out with a girl this weekend. For future reference, does this count as cheating?" ?
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
Facebook: “Hey you fucked on a diving board, you should probably should wish him a happy birthday”
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
Do you think in an oreo forest they would have rivers of milk?
Randomize