I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
You tried to convince her that if she gave you head she'd hear the ocean.....
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
I poured everyones drinks into the ice bucket and then stuck my face in it. Apparently I'm a greedy drunk.
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
Can you explain to me why there are fake boobs glued on my chest?
Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow...
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
I already plan to donate my brain to science so they can attempt to fully understand the complexities of my existence
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
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