I think as far as last words to bitter ex girlfriends go, "enjoy that staph infection youre about to get in your uterus" is right up there with the best
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
Those drunk pictures you took of me? My mom is showing those to my grandparents.
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
He took me home and by the time I woke up after catching up on sleep I realized I accidentally put on one of his fiances socks. whoops.
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
We were making out and truffle butter was playing in the background. I stopped mid make out session and said, "I'm really sorry but I have to rap Nicki's part."
He called me 'pal' while complimenting how well I took his load on my face. I've officially been fuckbuddy-zoned.
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
Had a job interview today. Walked into the room and said "IT'S GO TIME, BITCHES".
Apparently his ex was into edging and did it to him so much that it takes forever for him to cum
I hate you and your multiple orgasm sexcapades
Randomize
