bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
Fun fact of the day: Our cat does not like rum.
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
He even wore it to bed. What the hell. He's too excited about that goddamn costume.
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
All his ex-girlfriends are delicate flowers, tho. And I'm like a trash compactor.
I wouldn't worry about it. You know what they say, THICK THIGHS MAKE THE DICK RISE.
Dude.. She just busted into my house wearing a ski mask, a poncho, and thigh-high pink hooker boots and yelled, "THE CABS ARE HEEERRREEE!!"
ill drive you to the airport today if we can have sex first
i left yesterday
ill pick you up from the airport on sunday if we can have sex after
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
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