As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
Ok cool. Ill pick up liquor because, well let's be honest, we don't need an excuse anymore.
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Housing is going to charge us for any broken dishes/glassware. Steal as many glasses as you can from the bars tonight. I got the baking dish and 3 plates covered.
You tried to sled down the middle of the street. In. Your. Coat. Of course you are bruised.
Woke up with the note 'going outside. Ignore bloody spoon. Be back soon' taped to my forehead. Know anything about it?
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
But on the bright side the arresting officer was just as hot as I remember and I took a pretty okay mugshot.
Wtf did i hit my head on?
Tequila
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