the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
He has a chalkboard tally in his bathroom of "Me vs. Toilet". He's losing.
How do I invite him to our 4th of July cookout without sounding too much like "hey you were my first orgasm and I want your dick inside my while watching fireworks"
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
That's true. There's really no bad time to take a Vicodin.
It is the Reeses peanut butter cup of pharmaceuticals.
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
She took me into the bathroom and force fed me a panini, it was pretty good.
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
Randomize
