You were right, I'm so drunk and I want to eat the shit out of my vanilla cupcake candle it smells delish
Experience is the best teacher
I'm gonna have a badass scar
seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
I'm going to kill the bastard that switches my hot hookups from the previous night with ugly chicks
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
I agreed not to hook up with any randoms while she's on vacation, if that isn't a show of good faith then I don't know what is...
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
I'm too depressed to drink my wine. That is what I would call a serious problem
Its really hard to take a shit when the dog wont stop trying to crawl into your lap
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