and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
I woke up naked by my window. blinds open. smiley face drawn on my window.
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
So im going to watch Hocus Pocus in my footie pajamas... How am I in college?
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made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
My booty call got married. Come over before I start tagging all the places my dick has been in her wedding photos.
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
Walk-of-shaming home in that dress you got arrested in. Six guys called out your name when I walked past. I've never been more proud of us.
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
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You were walking away to pee and as you were undoing your belt you looked at me and said "the belt is off. the game is on. Remever that."
Do you have any puffy paint? I want to put "fiesta muthafuckas" on my sombrero but its too much to bedazzle.
Woke up with an e-cig stuck in my asshole. Explain.
I spent the entire party sexting people's significant others for them because they were too drunk to do it themselves. I did quite well too. I should start a business
In my defense I didn't know there was concrete on the other side of that fence when I tossed him over it.
You're both fucking idiots and this is why I should never let you two drink alone.
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
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