those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
Our relationship just reached the stage where i can touch her boobs while making a honking noise without getting hit in the face
I don't know what's worse: going to the liquor store at 9am or knowing that its open at 9am
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
Took out half a tooth with a handle of jim beam last night. Apparently I can't walk and chug bourbon at the same time
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
One does not fall in love, one falls flat on the their face after leaving a bar
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
So the door man at the local dispensary started giving me motivational talks about my beard...
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
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