i have a new swear word: supercalifuckaliciousexpialadamnit
He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
It's really not cool dreaming about going into labor with your ex boyfriends love child as you're sleeping next to him.
I legit had a 15 minute convo about dinosaurs with a guy at the bar last night cuz he was wearing a jurassic park shirt
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
Grindr hookup awareness: always make sure that you agree to blow one person and they aren't bringing a Friend/boyfriend. Shits weird when you're sober.
i'll talk to you in three hours when you've stopped foaming at the mouth and your eyes have rolled back into place
I walked in on him pumping himself up by headbanging to the drumbeat from Jumanji.
Some girls wake up to good morning texts. I wake up to pictures of an angry Shrek getting a blowjob.
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
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