Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
you can't exactly throw up or pass out at the pentagon so i had to pull my shit together
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude. Hurry up. They just blessed the tequila.
It's like a teen mom casting at the Obgyn's office. I feel great about my positive life decisions.
Someone left their drag queen on my couch. On the plus side, he sure does know how to make a mean cup of coffee.
When people ask about my bruises, I'm just going to say it was a doorknob. Or possibly a group of doorknobs. Angry doorknobs.
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently I'm the last girl he had sex with. That was over a month ago. If he can go that long without sex then he's clearly not the guy for me
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
Rule travel - in 2s or put an ankle monitor on me, and maybe a shock collar.
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
He told me he was cooking me a special dinner tonight. His "five star meal" was popcorn in champagne glasses, and chic fil a sauce in jello shot containers to dip the popcorn in. He still tries to convince me he doesn't smoke weed anymore.
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
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