In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
I have funfetti in my underwear...will you come get me?
I woke up on the steps beside a plate of spaghetti and a toilet paper roll ripped in half. And i actually think this day is gonna get better.
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
Random fact of the day: cum is a really good eye makeup remover
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
BRING ME THE PLAN B. ILL GIVE YOU A FREE WATER BOTTLE AND A BUMPER STICKER AND SOME BACON BITS
okay. well, yeah. i'm a mess and a half. this shit is not what dumbledore died for.
Beat the bartender in a shot challenge for a free tab. I won that, and him. I never get tired of the "this is my first time with a guy.." bullshit.
How do you even...
The magic of Christmas. And whiskey, of course.
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
I bet he’d be surprised by the epic blow job he’d get if he stopped talking about his wife long enough for me to get in the mood
Randomize
