Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
So I cleaned the toilet last night at 2 am and woke up with pink eye. Never doing that again.
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
Yeah, but there's no serving sizes for dick.
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
Ok, I have three hours. I'm trying to work out two blow jobs and a taco.
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
Well, I'm hung over and my penis hurts - two signs of success
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
Randomize
