He's telling me stories about how he made out with a 14 yr old when he was 22. I'm going home.
True love is taking a shit with the one you love in the bathroom with you.
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
Jen gave my number to some guy she met in NY. He sent me a picture of his weiner. He had nice shoes. I replied with a pic of bacon.
When in doubt always reply with bacon.
Found my other fake eyelash. In a condom wrapper...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woke up in the middle of my kitchen clutching a cheesy gordita crunch
I fought a guy last night because he said "extra pulp orange juice is the best orange juice"
DO NOT PREHEAT THE OVEN THIS MORNING! WE STARTED USING IT AS A WINE STASH AROUND MIDNIGHT.
Now I have the opportunity to have Chris Pratt or Channing Tatum?!? What a time to be alive.
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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