is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
it really sends the message that i like to impregnate mortal women and have them birth fantastic half man-half god infants.
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
im pretty sure this vending machine only exists when im drunk
Why is everyone in the bowling alley looking at me like i'm a prostitute just because I have bunny ears on?
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
I feel like an elephant shit on me and left me to be miserable
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
Don't masturbate while listening to Pandora. Just came during a buffalo wild wings commercial and I feel really weird about it.
Listen I'm tryna celebrate your divorce. Sometimes that calls for drinking on the toilet.
After we'd both come, we started writing a book about dragons. Woke up this morning to a full English breakfast. Can't thank you enough for introducing us
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