like if someone fucked a dictionary but instead of having a penis, it was just one of those leap frog educational toys
I hope to god you are high
saw my dad's penis on the x-ray last night. at least his hip wasn't broken
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
I think Memorial Day also marks the beginning of "Bikini Profile Picture" season.
He offered to drive me out of state to meet up with my fuck buddy. Like best brother in law ever.
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
You tried to impress her by kicking the 5th floor button in the elevator, but you ended up kicking everything from 3 to 11. Then you said, "pretty accurate, huh ladies?"
You won't wear your Santa suit, I can't get trashed, and you won't use handcuffs! This is the worst Christmas EVER.
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
he just fucked me for my cheese.
You told me not to tell you found out you're pregnant..
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
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