He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
I got kicked out of an open bar wedding reception. The bride "felt threatened" by my presence. Not my fault she's ugly
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
Jesus once told his disciples that its better to hang out with your best friend than give some douche bag a bj.
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
Yup, totally tried cooking bacon in the dryer last night.
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
I CAN'T FUCK HIM OUTSIDE. THAT'S FOR PEASANTS. HE'S TOO FAMOUS FOR THAT.
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
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