cynthia nixon should never get laid more than me
we hooked up on one of my student's desks last night...i can't decide if i'm ashamed or massively proud of myself
dude you teach first grade wtf
I made a vision board specifically for the purpose of boning john mayer.
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
You then proceeded to tell me how good of a cook you were and put raw cookie dough in the champagne.
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
Decided I'm going to wear a shirt that says "I'm sorry" whenever we go back to that fraternity
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
I wanna eat mushrooms and cuddle with a million dogs at once. I wanna know what heaven is like
My son's girlfriend just thanked me for having good penis genes.
Randomize