The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
i was watching some porn this morning and i realized i am blessed with a truly beautiful vagina
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
They only remember me when they're drunk...I'm like a suppressed memory.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up while squatting on top of my bed peeing on my comforter and my laptop
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
I sent two dick pics to a wrong number and one was in .gif format so it was helicoptering all over the place. I single handedly ruined a child's life.
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
who was i chillin with last night? i woke up in a storage unit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
I never thought I would have to arrest my own parents on a sunday night
I slapped a guy during sex last night because he moaned the wrong name. Then I remembered I gave him a fake name. Sorry bro.
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
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