I found a pair of size 15 female undies on my floor?? is that big?
We took shots in honor of Shark Week.
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
I've see this movie. You sext me after the bar and fall asleep mid sentence. Roll credits.
i'm sure the inside of her vag looks like Normandy circa 1944
and yes i had to double check that date for that joke to be accurate
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
I tried to pay my tab and go home but she wrote me a "list of things I'm good at" with fellatio as no 1...
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
I love when Facebook suggests people I may know. Well, yeah, I know him. He's my drug dealer. Pretty sure I want to keep that relationship strictly professional.
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize
