Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
I'm waiting for seagulls to eat this throw up
He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
I can't believe you're fucking in the bar bathroom, but everyone else can, and they're really proud.
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
I hijacked a bellboy cart and rolled into the party dancing on it
I got hammered with my chem professor at 4:30. I'm pretty sure that can't be topped by any real sort of institution.
Owwwww. Yeah. I can barely move unless Im high on vicodin. We are bad at drinking/balancing. We will be the first to break hips and have to go into a home.
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
he was like tryna hang and chat and I was like dude there's an iguana in this room
God damn. You sleep with one 40 year old married dude and suddenly you have “daddy issues”. Fuck all of you.
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
Randomize
