your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
you sent me the whole alphabet, one letter a text. it took 15 minutes to read them all
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
Everyone is sleeping and i'm sittin here in my iron man mask, watchin chelsea lately and tryin to figure out how to smoke through it.
I asked if he wanted to come over and he said he was busy. Then I sent him a pic of me in the bath with the bottle of wine I already finished and all of a sudden he was free. Booty calls are too easy.
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
Can I just lay in bed and you pour vodka through a funnel in my mouth?
If she gets mad at me, that only means more free time for me. I like to put myself I win win situations. Despite being in a relationship, I still find ways to accomplish my goals.
I'm not in bed, I'm driving and puking at the same time.... first for everything
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
Randomize
