I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
All i have left of him are the magnum X-Large condoms he left in my room, knowing full well that no other guy I hook up with will be able to fill his shoes. He taunts me.
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
looking at my texts from you makes me want to throw up in my pants
He's my BOYFRIEND but he won't sext me. I'll be like, "tell me how you want to fuck me", and he's like, "I love how we can talk about our feelings". FUCK
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
So that 100 days of sobriety thing I told you about last week? Lasted all of 4 days. Fuck it, life's too short
You might have been able to redeem yourself had you not referred to grandma as "this bitch".
That explains the hand print on my face. That old lady knows how to throw a punch.
When cunnilingus is one of the first 25 words you say to someone there's a problem
#reasonsyoushouldnthaveatinder
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
Nothing says depression like laying in your bed stoned, naked, and eating a cupcake
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
Do you know why I slept in the yard last night?
You said you watched the lion king stoned and had to do it for simba.
Pride rock will get you every time.
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