sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
She told me she couldnt give me head last night because she was running out of listerine
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
he slapped my stomach and proclaimed it a baby-free zone
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going to fix your towel rack. I broke it while I was dancing on it.
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
In other news, I tore a tendon in my hand from giving my boyfriend handjobs so that's how my day is going
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
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