That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
Doing laundry, just found a knob off your stove in my pants pocket. I don't know.
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
When he wakes up tomorrow with half shaved legs smelling like a preteens bathroom, I'm sure he will think he has had a great evening
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
My manager said you offered to make out with him to ensure I keep my job if I didn't show up to work today
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