my elementary bus driver served me drinks last night. He hooked me up
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
Apparently he doesn't remember leaving the bar
If I spent $100 at the bar and didn't get laid I wouldn't want to remember anything either
Aren't you glad we're at the point in our relationship where I don't even ask why you're hiding in the cabinet?
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
Noooo. I told you she WAS a cancer. Not that she HAS cancer. This was the one time being a doctor didnt get you laid you alcoholic bastard
She sucks dick like Beethoven on piano, but talking to her is like Simple Jack in Tropic Thunder. Still working out the pros vs cons list.
well I have to shit but I'm too hungover to push, and I snorted advil so I wouldn't have to swallow it and throw up.. hungover is an understatement.
So worth it. Come over for bacon egg cheese vusquit later. 12. I slept with Jimmy? On my period? And told him he had mother issues? No tequila. Tequila bad.
I need a life alert for his random dick pics. My heart can't handle that.
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
Randomize
