Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
Dude. He put me on a rewards point system for his dick. I have to do him favors now to build up to winning sex. This is shit.
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
Let's just do a victory lap through all of our exes.
Hey, I shot that toilet dead center, drunk, from at least 6 ft away. I'm a fuckin awesome shot. You guys were completely safe.
Yes, that toilet won't be hurting anyone anymore.... Hahaha
I would just like to go ahead and accept my slut of the year award.
It's like 10 times better than an Oscar
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
The creeper at the bar just realized we have the same birthday and bought me four beers already. He walked off so I took his change and dashed, i'm bringing the case over now.
Do you remember punching the light out in the bathroom? I didn't, and that was at bar 2 of 4…
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