I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
i left the bar a little after you and ended up flipping my car in the arbys drive thru
I may have told her we're dating for a handjob, Fake tits are overrated.
My roommate was eating ketchup out of a bowl. Get me the hell out of here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just had Stella and stale goldfish for breakfast under the watchful eyes of an inflatable cactus and 5 llama pinatas. Cinco de mayo success!
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
I'm gonna tell the medical examiner that your cause of death was over-arousal.
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
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