Ambien. No doubt about it.
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
I'm pretty sure we've had sex a bunch more times than we've hugged. So hugs are weird when they happen.
I think I would be able to remember how to smoke but I can't seem to remember how to breathe.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
A milkman. But instead of milk I'm delivering marijuana. And instead of a milk truck it's an armored car.
You're a weed delivery man, in an armored car?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I will expect an hourly check text to confirm you are alive and that you aren't dead in a ditch somewhere with a hobo dry humping your corpse
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
Randomize