this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
Just lit a joint with steel wool and a 9 volt battery... thank you 3rd grade science class
Green mimosas i think yes
I think he pocket dials me so much because I'm in his phone as 'Air Mattress'
last night a police horse bit me when i was wasted. even the animal kingdom knows i'm no good
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
I messaged him asking for his address. He replied with the address then said, "If you're gonna stalk me, I'm the third window on the side and usually get naked around 8am and anytime randomly after 6pm (listen for music).. If you're sending anthrax, I'm 6'2" 225lbs so send a good amount."
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
As soon as I got there, you appeared out of no where, yelled "they're giving away free cigarettes!" in my face and then disappeared and I didn't see you the rest of the night.
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
I'm trying to get weird tonight. Like I want to see bitches crawling on all fours drinking milk from bowls and shit by 5 am. You down?
I woke up to Dragon Ball Z playing in Portuguese and a donut shish-kebab~ed on a dick in my face.
I'm at her wedding and she managed to get every single one night stand I ever had in her wedding party. Why does she hate me?
Randomize
