...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
Dude, this chick just tossed my salad hard. All that I could picture was a dog trying to get the last of the peanut butter out of the jar of Jiff and trying not to think of how grotesque my last dump was.
Then she tried to kiss me and I wouldn't and she got pissed off and went to sleep. Then about an hour later, her kid called her. She went home and on the way out I told her to wash her mouth before she kissed her kid good night. Weird night..
if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
there's a sign at taco bell and it says "bacon and ranch make everything better." it speaks to me.
They're like penises that have been put in a blender.
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
There was a stripper pole on the party bus. Was being past tense because some fat chick somehow tore it from the ceiling while grinding
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
(This is the second time ive been high enough to decide to run for office)
One can only be this extremely wet once a year and I feel like I'm bitch slapping god by not using this gift he has bestowed on me.
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
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