ADVERTISEMENT

• (515): View more from Iowa

  How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away

  Fav 21 963 3158

  share tweet
  

• (419): View more from Ohio

  so i was trying to be sexy and unzip his pants with my teeth. i got my lip caught in the zipper and it bled for a good 15 min, totally a mood killer.

  Fav 17 872 7320

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (937): View more from Ohio

  I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning

  Fav 22 1466 6119

  share tweet
  

• (440): View more from Ohio

  One of my friends found 6 bags of gummy bears on the roof. He lives a building over. Apparently even hammered you still have quite an arm

  Fav 16 5899 921

  share tweet
  
• 

  21 People Tragically Stumbled Upon A Dead Body

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (917): View more from New York City

  I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant

  Fav 40 5302 1957

  share tweet
  

• (402): View more from Nebraska

  Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.

  Fav 8 1304 3074

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (850): View more from Florida

  it's like a walk of shame rule, you always run into someone who saw you wearing that yesterday

  Fav 2 3423 1098

  share tweet
  

• (860): View more from Connecticut

  It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.

  Fav 7 3212 1373

  share tweet
  

• (218): View more from Minnesota

  My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.

  Fav 8 1433 678

  share tweet
  
• 

  27 Socially Expected Things That Are The Absolute Worst

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (540): View more from Virginia

  Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".

  Fav 7 1054 762

  share tweet
  

• (216): View more from Ohio

  Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud

  Fav 3 1704 754

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (360): View more from Washington

  That's the 3rd time in 6 months I woke up on the hallway floor using a towel as a blanket, no clue how I got there. At least back when I was still drinking I could blame something other than myself for that kind of shit.

  (206): View more from Washington

  You should go to AA meetings and warn people about the dangers of sobriety.

  Fav 0 937 525

  share tweet
  

• (224): View more from Illinois

  And then you two got up and shouted in near perfect unison "I'M ALWAYS A SLUT FOR BASKIN ROBBINS" The bar just looked at us horrified.

  Fav 2 347 107

  share tweet
  

• (905): View more from Ontario

  I'm getting paid over-time to sit on reddit and look at dicks and abs all day. I'm really happy right now.

  Fav 1 282 92

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (904): View more from Florida

  Listen, I bought the coke that got us those free drinks, okay? Show some respect.

  Fav 1 133 83

  share tweet
  

Randomize