I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
She's walking to the bar while holding a fifth of fireball, talking on the phone and puking like its nothing out of the ordinary
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
You know you've been on Tinder too long when you're the guy cropped out of the profile pic. Of a woman you're still seeing...
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
I just had to ask my drug dealer to "keep it simple for me". Is this a new low?
We've done worse things
I'm covered in bruises and scratches. I dont know whether to call them battlescars or sex decals
Randomize
