I just woke up surrounded in unopened snacks
Betty ford says i'm here all night
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
i am officially better prepared for a hangover tomorrow than i was for christmas.
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
A 12 year old Canadian kid said I was a pussy for only buying a 28-pack. I fit in better in this country.
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
Thanks for alerting everyone in our apartment what your one night stand's name is. Could you scream a little louder?
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
Sex. Target parking lot. I really am the mayor.
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