well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
i cant believe i hit a parked car with a pink dildo in my mouth... fuckin epic
the pharmacist hit on me as i picked up my herpes medecine. i think we found a winner.
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
google maps should a have a setting for this. like I AM ABANDONING EVERYTHING TO MEET A GIRL WHO IS 10 HOURS OF MILES AWAY. HOW DO WE DO THIS OPTIMALLY?
These people don't understand my stages of drunk
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
When do you sleep by the way. I was surprised when I went to work at 1 am,left at 7 am and had a text from you somewhere in between
I just vodka nap now...
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
All I'm saying is that if he knows his wife walks around naked during the day, he shouldn't bring a friend home for lunch and show up unannounced.
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
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