She wanted to fuck you. You threw up on her. Congrats.
ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
I don't know what to be prouder of: the fact that last night i was able to successfully find my way home from evanston with 3-d glasses on, or that i was able to make my way around my house in the dark with my pants around my ankles
Doing 9 month old dishes in my bath tub. These dishes literally had enough time to gestate a human child
MIDGETS
????
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
Randomize
