I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
Saw my boss's vagina at that party. Hung over at work has never been more acceptable
My brain is foggy with friends reruns and him licking hummus off my tits.
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
He spent like 5 minutes figuring out how best to position me so I would still be able to watch the game. Maybe there is a benefit to dating a guy who cares about me but doesn't care about my team.
Pretty sure this is the part where you go buy a ring.
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
My one night stand just messaged me and said he is praying for me...
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
Y'all let us switch shirts in the middle of 200 people....why did you let me get this drunk by noon?
Randomize
