Ugh I just know that when I take off his pants his underwear will have Megan's Law written all over them.
Update: no underwear. Greeeeen light.
so just saw tiger woods pull a page out of his wifes book and hit some kid in the head with a golf club
She took the bride and groom figures and the top layer of their cake and tried to walk out of the reception with it in her purse.
If I get laid, we are framing that mattress and hanging it on the wall as the place we both lost our virginities.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
The worst decision I made last night was allowing myself to be duct taped to the ceiling
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
She's cute, but batshit. Like some kind of dominatrix disney princess.
Doc gave me something stronger than Xanax. The pills have your last name imprinted on them. This cannot be coincidence.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I gave them the 'I used to fuck your son' discount.
He was pretty handsy. Told me I tasted like smoke. Good think he tasted that and not the stomach acid I just puked not ten minutes before.
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
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