I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
The UPD just told me that he was going to call the cops if i try to run. you owe me 5 dollars, i told u they arn't real cops
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
Sorry we couldn't "turn off the mirrors." How're you feeling today?
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
Plus I'm on the toilet and I can only describe it as if someone had kicked the cap off of a fire hydrant.
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
You were supposed to be my wingman and all you kept to her friend was "kill it with fire"..
I just put Gatorade in my wine, cause electrolytes, you know.
is that a dick in a sweater?
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
Apparently I've texted the word shitfucked so much it auto-completes it now.
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