fuck, i think i'm broken. Alchyhol air mattress = the suck.
i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
Glad I can drunkenly remember to not get tomatoes on my Mexican pizza but can't tell a guy to keep his hands off my ass
I swear to god if I have to repeat this to you one more mother fucking time I will flip fucking shit and acidic rain will pour down upon your mother fucking soul
I'm surronded by jorts. You're probably too drunk to care. I'm gonna cry now. Love you.
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
I was too hungover to sit up and pull the curtains closed so I did it with my toes
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